14 Things to do in Atlanta

A giant sign reading "Virginia Lee" written in marker greets me at the airport through the windshield of my hostess' car.  Sabrina's wild, curly hair pokes out of Merve, her trusty Mazda. 

Sabrina.  She tells me the locals hate referring to Atlanta as Hotlanta.  A-town it is.

The car fills with our cackles and smoke as we laugh at the comically large sign that never quite made it a baggage claim welcome.  It smells faintly of the art teacher's office.  Her steering wheel shakes after 60 miles per hour. We drift on the humid Atlanta highway, headed for Roswell. There is whiskey on the horizon.  And I'm ready.

Atlanta is huge.  I traipsed around North Atlanta, East Cobb, Roswell, East Atlanta and made my way downtown, finishing with our dramatic W Hotel stay and a decadent dinner at Buckhead's Aria.  I didn't see it all, but I saw a lot.  Sabrina's group of friends are diverse, loud, and full of life.  We partied well into the morning hours, lighting sparkler's off of Marlo's rocking chair covered porch in East Atlanta.  I felt true southern hospitality and ate enough indulgent food to keep my personal trainer and dietician busy for at least another year.  A definite contrast to my visit to Northern California.  Atlanta was one giant party.

Things to do in Atlanta

1. Have someone greet you at the airport with a giant sign.

2. Eat burgers at Vortex.

3. Feel a little miserable about it.

I avoided the coronary line of burgers which involve  a fried egg on a half pound burger.

4. Recover.

3  Have a staring contest with a cat.

4. Eat crickets

Really, those are sour cream and onion crickets.

5. Try every soda ever in the world of coca cola

My tummy hurt after this.

6. Crash a rooftop pool party at the W

7. Leave with souvenirs

8. Drink a bottle of whiskey every day you are there.

not really. 

9. Hang out with local celebrities.  As in the white guy (Ricky Raw) in this video.  I want that bacon and eggs scarf.

10. Meet Paul Somer's Asian doppelganger.

11. Hang out with Turk from Scrubs.

Nah, it was just his doppelhanger

12. Eat at Aria , one of the top Atlanta restaurants and get treated like royalty (no pictures here, you know how I hate taking pictures in restaurants)

14. Eat at Delia's Chicken Sausage Stand and get treated like a glutton.  Yeah, that's a chicken sausage sandwich on a donut.

photo from thesausagestand.com

Thanks Sabrina and Friends, for helping me live through the least amount of sleep and I've had since college and showing me a fabulous time.

15 things to do in California

15 things to do in California

1.  Eat dim sum in San Francisco with legit Chinese people.

Barrett's lovely grandma who insisted I get squid and ordered off the menu.

The menu.

2.  Explore some sketchy Battery to get a view.

I climbed to the top of this in cowboy boots.

Some popular bridge...jeez, what was it again?

3.  Scowl at hippies in Haight.  Scowl with hipsters in the Mission.

You know how I feel about hippies.

Perplexed...why does it cost so much to look cheap?  The shopping was ridiculous.

4.  Go to a food truck festival.  Eat at more than three trucks.

By the harbor near Golden Gate.

Indian curry in a burrito with basmati. SHUTUP!

I also have never seen so many Asian Americans that spoke perfect English in one place.

5.  Scoot your huskies.  Wait, you can do that anywhere.

Those Californians.....my sister in law with her huskies.

6.  Visit the Black Chasm.  A huge crack in the earth.

7.  See some of the biggest trees you will ever see.

8.  Be warned.

9.  Learn more than you want to know about wine making.

each of these barrels from France costs any where from $1500-$2000 and are only used up to three times before they are converted to a life of storage or turned into some souvenir cutting board.

10. Go to a barrel tasting.

First winery (with my in laws), not intoxicated one bit.

This guy studies wine making in Davis as well as on the vineyard.  The life.  He has plans to open his own winery.

11. Go to a super exclusive estate winery.  Taste wines they only make 74 cases of.

Casa Nueva...they sustain themselves on their wine clubs.  They do not  participate in retail.

12. Mingle with cool locals that have wineries, sheep, goats and pair food straight off the land and grill with their wine.

surfer dude who makes wine.

Funny story...the winery bought the goats to get rid of weeds, instead they ate the grapes.  Now they just live a life of leisure on the propery.

13.  Feel a mix of jealousy and awe.  Eat at the Culinary Institute of America.

14.  Take in some views.

15. Forget your sunglasses.

Words from an Ex-Citizen of the Restaurant World

I recently had the pleasure of taking a sneak peak into my former life of serving.  I catered a large-scale fancy pants event in DC with a bunch of 19 year olds as my fellow employees.  I was 18 years old when I first started to wait tables.  I was clueless.  I was a terrible server.  I hope I never, ever waited on you.  I'm positive you would not want to return to the Lonestar Steakhouse (who would anyway?).

As I was elbow deep in dish water (some girl DIDN'T know that there was a garbage disposal in the kitchen...but I bet she knows how to download apps on her iPhone), scrubbing 80 plates for a party of 220, I noticed I had the only sense of urgency.  Was I in a different time zone?

Some good days at Ruby Tuesdays. Classy...can you find me?

I continued to cringe all evening as I overheard the service make small talk with the guests, put dirty dishes on the same tray used for clean dishes, pick at all of the food, and have no concept of The Hustle.  After over 10 years in the restaurant business (I had my first job busing tables at 15) I feel I can give some tips on how to not be Me when I was 18:

Things I learned from waiting tables/ things you should expect from your server.


1. Full hands in, full hands out.  If you're leaving the kitchen, you should be running some food out or something to your table, if you are coming in, you are cleaning something from front of the house.  Trust me, this will pay off and get you out of the weeds faster than you know.

2. NEVER ever, ever assumed you've been tipped. When collecting a check say "I'll be back with your change" or nothing at all.  Then let the guest decide to tell you if you should keep the change.

3. Keep your mouth shut. No one wants to hear about your day.  Awkward.  I've recently had a string of servers that talked way too much.  Here's something to remember...you are great, but they are not there to see you.

4. Remember, its just food.  It's not the end of the world if table 9 gets an over-cooked steak.  Just say you're sorry and fix it.

5. Hustle.  Seriously, have a sense of urgency- 10 minutes to you is nothing if you're there for 4 hours, but 10 minutes is a chunk you're stealing from someone's lunch break if you're out smoking a cig instead of checking on their food.

6. Keep your clothes as clean as possible.  Keep that uniform/apron/whatever clean as possible before and during your shift.

7. Don't touch the guests.  I once spilled a place of porkchops on a guy's lap.  It was really uncomfortable when I frantically wiped his crotch.

8. If you don't know what to do, clean.  I was severely annoyed when I saw my fellow workers standing around while I was busting my ass trying to get clean wine glasses out.

9. Help others, they will help you.  When you're in the weeds, people remember what you've done for them.

10. Know the menu.  Know what you're selling.  No one is going to buy a sandwich from you if you don't even know what's in it.

and to be fair...

Things you should know as a Customer:


1. Thank you goes a long way...

2. But being nice doesn't replace a tip.  I tip 20% before tax on exceptional service.  15% on meh service, and 10% on negligent service.

3. A bad attitude might not get your food spit on, but at least ten people will be talking trash about you in the kitchen.  Still don't care?  That's fine, we had a great time poking fun at any weakness in your physical appearance or manner.  We've probably already nicknamed you.

4. If somethings taking long, you have the right to ask.  Don't feel bad.

5. Nothing will happen on time on a Saturday night.

6. If you have at least 2 major messups in a dining experience, something should be comped

7. Something everyone should know by now: If you're at a bar...don't snap your fingers, if I told you my name don't shout it constantly, I see you. Have your order READY with method of payment, craft cocktails take longer. Note: this not only help the bartenders, but it allows other patrons to be helped in the most efficient way possible.  a boozetopia if you will.

The Best Thing I Ate in Brooklyn

There we were...walking back from a fabulous brunch at Miriam in Park Slope, Brooklyn (and swinging the sensible shoes I had purchased at Beacon's Closet) on a beautiful Saturday afternoon.  Amidst the pet shops, bike shops, thrift stores, futuristic baby strollers (that is what Park Slope is made up of), I look up and see an unremarkable green awning.  "Christie's Jamaican Beef Patties" I say aloud.  Both Raskia and James Boice's eyes light up at my observation.

They insist I try one.  They are the best in Brooklyn.  I've made a cosmic connection.  Of all the stores to say aloud, I pick this one.  I had to eat one.  

I apologize for not having a picture.  I hate taking pictures of food I'm going to eat in public places.  Is that weird?  I just think it's tacky.  The truth is I was so preoccupied with this meat pocket, that I couldn't think about taking a picture.  So here's one I found on the internet:

from mightysweet.com

Anyway.  In case you don't know, a Jamaican beef patty is a spicy ground beef turnover with a flaky crust.  James and I couldn't even wait to get to the apartment (or Prospect Park even) to dig in.  We sat on a bench on the side of the sidewalk and devoured half of a pattie (this is after a full brunch mind you).  It was delicious...hints of cumin, scotch bonnet pepper, thyme...it was all there.  My mouth waters just thinking of it.

Honorable mention:  Steak and eggs at Vinegar Hill House.  The ambiance was perfect...small farmhouse out of an Anthropologie catalog.  Polite, slender, stylish, tattooed, beautiful wait staff.  French-pressed coffee, local ingredients, craft cocktails with special ice  blah blah, every foodie's dream.  Again, no pics of the food, you know how I roll.  But here's the garden patio where we sipped our coffee and waited for our table.

cross-processed for your viewing pleasure